I have a different constitution. I have a different brain; I have a different heart; I got tiger blood, man.
I still don't have all the answers. I'm more interested in what I can do next than what I did last.
I am on a drug. It's called Charlie Sheen.
You either love or you hate. You live in the middle, you get nothing.
Best way to not get your heart broken, is pretend to don't have one.
Quotes about Charlie Sheen
You look at me, but you're not quite sure
Am I it or could you get more?
You learn cool from magazines
You learned love from Charlie Sheen
Am I it or could you get more?
You learn cool from magazines
You learned love from Charlie Sheen
Jewel - Intuition, Album: 0304
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The damage has been done. All that's left to do now is drink until the part of the brain that creates mental pictures is dead.
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 18
6Alan: "What are you afraid off?"
Charlie: "I'm afraid I'm gonna hit you so hard, I'll be an only-child."
Charlie: "I'm afraid I'm gonna hit you so hard, I'll be an only-child."
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 15
6Alan: "Charlie, there's a half naked woman in our kitchen!"
Charlie: "Which half?"
Charlie: "Which half?"
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 6
6Alan: "Charlie, I need you to be my eyes and ears."
Charlie: "Okay, but you have to be my liver and prostate."
Charlie: "Okay, but you have to be my liver and prostate."
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 2
6Alcohol is for people who can afford to lose a few brain-cells.
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 6 Episode 3
6Alan: "When a boy becomes a man - and that's what you're becoming - he has to start protecting the women in his life from certain things."
Charlie: "Like the truth."
Charlie: "Like the truth."
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 12
4It doesn't matter if you win or loose, it's whether or not you beat the spread.
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 5
4Ah, cars. Where would we be without cars? And how would we get there?
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 4 Episode 22
4Charlie: "You know who wrote that song? Your uncle Charlie wrote that!"
Jake: "No lie?"
Charlie: "Kid if I was gonna lie, it would've been 'Stairway To Heaven' and not 'The Maple-Loops-Song'."
Jake: "No lie?"
Charlie: "Kid if I was gonna lie, it would've been 'Stairway To Heaven' and not 'The Maple-Loops-Song'."
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 1
3Dont worry, there's not enough blood left in my legs to go anywhere.
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 1
3Charlie: "With his grades, he might as well get used to pushing shopping carts around."
Alan: "Are you saying my son's gonna end up working in a supermarket?"
Charlie: "No, I'm saying he's probably gonna end up homeless."
Alan: "Are you saying my son's gonna end up working in a supermarket?"
Charlie: "No, I'm saying he's probably gonna end up homeless."
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 3 Episode 17
3Women reject me for 100 different reasons. White teeth would reduce that to 99 problems.
Alan Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 10 Episode 2
1Well, listen, just remember, that love will get u through times of no money better, than money will get you through times of no love.
Alan Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 9 Episode 20
5Alan: "Why don't you get a vasectomy?"
Charlie: "I've considered it. In fact, a couple of years ago I believe there was a petition circulating."
Charlie: "I've considered it. In fact, a couple of years ago I believe there was a petition circulating."
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 24
1Alan: "I feel sorry that your heart has become so hard and small, that you've lost the capacity to connect with another human being on any level any more meaningful, than the inebriated exchange of bodily fluids."
Charlie: "Boy, leave it to you to take a beautiful thing like drunken sex and make it sound dirty."
Charlie: "Boy, leave it to you to take a beautiful thing like drunken sex and make it sound dirty."
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 16
2Alan: "You can't stay here alone."
Jake: "Why not?"
Alan: "You know why not."
Jake: "But you don't have a turtle to put in the microwave anymore."
Jake: "Why not?"
Alan: "You know why not."
Jake: "But you don't have a turtle to put in the microwave anymore."
Jake Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 11
2Alan: "We judge a person by what's inside and not by what they wear."
Jake: "Lucky for you, huh?"
Jake: "Lucky for you, huh?"
Jake Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 11
2Charlie: "Don't cry, we can still be friends!"
Alan: "What?"
Charlie: "I'm sorry, it's the only thing I know to say when someone cries around here."
Alan: "What?"
Charlie: "I'm sorry, it's the only thing I know to say when someone cries around here."
Charlie Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 3
2Judith: "I'm very concerned, he's just a child. I don't know if he can deal with this."
Charlie: "Give your son some credit, he's an incredible kid."
Judith: "I was talking about you!"
Charlie: "Give your son some credit, he's an incredible kid."
Judith: "I was talking about you!"
Judith Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 1 Episode 3
1Be sure to wear a condom, not everything stays in Vegas!
Alan Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 9 Episode 8
1I give you a hint: I didn't do the dog 'people-style'.
Alan Harper in Two and a half Men - Season 9 Episode 8
Alan: "Look, if you feel so strongly about this girl, why don't you just call her?"
Charlie: "Yeah, sure, I could call her. I could also Fed-Ex her my testicles in a little silk bag."
Charlie: "Yeah, sure, I could call her. I could also Fed-Ex her my testicles in a little silk bag."
I go about my business, I'm doing fine
Besides what would I say if I had you on the line?
Same old story, not much to say
Hearts are broken, everyday
Besides what would I say if I had you on the line?
Same old story, not much to say
Hearts are broken, everyday
Jewel - You Were Meant For Me, Album: Pieces of You
Well in case you failed to notice
In case you failed to see
This is my heart bleeding before you
This is me down on my knees
These foolish games are tearing me apart
And your thoughtless words are breaking my heart
In case you failed to see
This is my heart bleeding before you
This is me down on my knees
These foolish games are tearing me apart
And your thoughtless words are breaking my heart
Jewel - Foolish Games, Album: Pieces of You
There can be no balance with a hand on the scale.
Harry, suffering like this proves you are still a man! This pain is part of being human.
If there hadn't been women we'd still be squatting in a cave eating raw meat, because we made civilization in order to impress our girlfriends.
My father always said, "Never trust anyone whose TV is bigger than their book shelf" - so I make sure I read.
If one does not attach himself to people and desires, never shall his heart be broken. But then, does he ever truly live?
One should judge a man mainly from his depravities. Virtues can be faked. Depravities are real.
I'm much more proud of being a father than being an actor.
I dream of a day where I walk down the street and hear people talk about Morality, Sustainibility and Philoshophy instead of the Kardashians.
I never thought I'd see in my life a black candidate running for President.
You can close your eyes to the things you do not want to see. But you cannot close your heart to the things you do not want to feel.
One candidate is too old and mentally unfit to be president. The other one is me.
Joe Biden - März 2024