Quotes by Homer Simpson

Quotes by Homer Simpson
Quote by Homer Simpson from The Simpsons in Season 9 Episode 5

If I didn't have this gun, the king of England could walk right in here and start pushing you around.

Gun-Control
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Quote by Homer Simpson from The Simpsons in Season 9 Episode 5

When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power. Like God must feel when he's holding a gun.

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Quote by Homer Simpson from The Simpsons

Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene'.

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Quote by Homer Simpson from The Simpsons

Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is another nail.

Marriage
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Quote by Homer Simpson from The Simpsons

I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life.
Number 1: 'Cover for me.'
Number 2: 'Oh, good idea, Boss!'
Number 3: 'It was like that when I got here.'

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Quote by Homer Simpson from The Simpsons

Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand.

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Quote by Homer Simpson from The Simpsons in Season 5 Episode 3

I am so smart, I am so smart! S-M-R-T!

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Quote by Homer Simpson from The Simpsons in Season 5 Episode 18

Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

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Quote by Homer Simpson from The Simpsons

If you don't like your job, you don't strike: you just go in every day and do it really half assed. That's the American way.

America
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Quote by Homer Simpson from The Simpsons in Season 8 Episode 10

No son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies, and kid's with fake ID's.

Beer
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Quote by Homer Simpson from The Simpsons

Where's the 'any key'? Hm... I think I order a 'tab'.

Beer, Computer
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Quote by Homer Simpson from The Simpsons in Season 8 Episode 18

To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems!

Alcohol
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