Quotes from How I Met Your Mother (TV-series) (Page 10)

How I Met Your Mother is a US tv-series. The quotes from the main characters Ted Mosby, Barney Stinson, Robin Scherbatsky, Lily Aldrin and Marshall Eriksen make the series legendary.

Right now, the ninth season of How I Met Your Mother is running on CBS.

Quotes from How I Met Your Mother (TV-series)
Quotes 226 to 250 of 4441789101112131418
Quote by Lily Aldrin from How I Met Your Mother in Season 7 Episode 5

I'm growing a child in my belly, a child that just developed ears, and it's a very thin sweater. So, please, if you must tell your story, just make it cheerful.

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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 24

Career has been trouncing romance for years. It's like the Globetrotters versus the Generals: Career's sinking hook shots from half court, romance is just a bunch of slow white guys, who couldn't make it in the Italian league.

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Quote by Lily Aldrin from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 24

Marshall Eriksen, put a baby in my belly.

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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 23

There is only one street where that is normal. Here's a hint: A giant yellow bird lives on it.

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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 22

Fine, you guys can have a baby, but only under these conditions:
1) You promise to always love me more than the baby.
2) Once a month, I get to use the baby to pick up chicks.
3) That may involve the baby falling from a two-story window and me heroically catching it.
4) No breast-feeding in front of me.
5) Forget about 4), you can whip 'em out whenever you want.

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Quote by Lily Aldrin from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 22

Robin: 'Have plans with Don on Saturday, he's making me Chinese.'
Lily: 'I'll assume you're talking about food, otherwise, I have some follow-up-questions.'

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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 20

Clint: 'Ted, your mother is a very, very erotic woman.'
Ted: 'Please don't.'

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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 20

Sometimes our best decisions are the ones that don't make any sense at all.

Failures, Decisions
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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 20

Ted: 'I made a bid online, I won the auction the next day and I got approval. I just finalized the paperwork.'
Barney: 'And was the Blair Witch easy to deal with, or did she haggle over the closing costs?'

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Quote by Robin Scherbatsky from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 19

Robin: 'Ted, are you acting out the last scene of 'Sleepless in Seattle' with little dolls?'
Ted: 'How long have you been out here?'
Robin: 'Ten seconds.'
Ted: 'Yeah - just the last scene.'

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Quote by Lily Aldrin from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 14

In commemoration of Barney's induction into the 'Hall of Game', this tie, worn on the seventh night of his perfect week, is hereby retired.

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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 14

Ted: 'You always kept your toothbrush in the bedroom. Also weird, by the way.'
Lily: 'No. We kept it in the bathroom.'
Ted: 'No, there was only one toothbrush in the bathroom, and it was mine...'

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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 13

Barney: 'I had a drinking game based on Robin. But it was actually ON Robin: I'd pour peach schnapps in her belly button...'
Ted: 'Dude, we agreed we wouldn't do this.'
Barney: 'Sorry. You're right. She didn't like it anyway. Said it woke her up.'

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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 7 Episode 4

Even if I meet the girl of my dreams right the second, I'm still one night and nine months away, from having a family on my own. And that's assuming the mother of my childern is just a huge slut.

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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 7 Episode 4

For some women it was the ashes of my parents. For others it was the trophy from Wimbledon and believe it or not, for one busty dullard, it was both. Game, enormous set and match!

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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 7 Episode 4

We've always been a trio! We're right up there with Batman and Robin and Alfred. Romeo and Juliet and the apothecary. Salt and pepper and cumin.

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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 10

Nobody likes to be alone, especially after a breakup. But that's when we discover who we really are and what we really want.

Lovesick, Solitude
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Quote by Robin Scherbatsky from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 10

What's in the box? What's in the box? WHAT'S IN THE BOX?
Right? Brad pitt? Seven?

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Quote by Marshall Eriksen from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 11

Wherein I suggested that you take your head and store it within yourself, in a fashion that, while space-saving, might limit its exposure to sunshine.

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Quote by Robin Scherbatsky from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 9

Ted: 'No, seriously Robin, you should get the slap. I mean, you're a great slapper. In fact, I want to study slapping under your tutelage. I want to be your slap-prentice.'
Robin: 'Don't sell yourself short there, Teddy. You're a slapping rock star. Your name should be Eric Slapton.'

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Quote by Robin Scherbatsky from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 8

Marshall: 'Where is your playbook?'
Robin: 'My playbook? Bro, uh, two-volume set, right here.
Ted: 'It's a great read, actually.'
Lily: 'Yeah, I'm reading it right now.'

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Quote by Robin Scherbatsky from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 7

Well, maybe this isn't a breakup. Maybe this is two friends getting back together.

Friendship, Relationships
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Quote by Lily Aldrin from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 6

Marshall: 'I don't care if the dishes aren't done, okay? If you care, you do it.'
Lily: 'Great, then I don't care if you have an orgasm. If you care, you do it.'

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Quote by Marshall Eriksen from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 6

I'm a good boyfriend in my sleep. I can rock a killer foot rub with one hand and brew a kick-ass pot of chamomile in the other, that would make you weep. Hell, I've forgotten more about microwaving fat-free popcorn and watching Sandra Bullock movies than you'll ever know, but: thanks for your concern, rook!

Relationships
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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 5 Episode 5

Not only are you wrong... but you are belligerently sticking to your guns and insulting me in the process. Robin Scherbatsky, you are an American.

America
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Quotes 226 to 250 of 4441789101112131418

Characters from How I Met Your Mother