Quotes from How I Met Your Mother (TV-series) (Page 2)

How I Met Your Mother is a US tv-series. The quotes from the main characters Ted Mosby, Barney Stinson, Robin Scherbatsky, Lily Aldrin and Marshall Eriksen make the series legendary.

Right now, the ninth season of How I Met Your Mother is running on CBS.

Quotes from How I Met Your Mother (TV-series)
Quotes 26 to 50 of 44412345678918
Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 4

Ted: 'So, you are mad about me and Robin holding hands.'
Barney: 'Of course I'm mad Ted. Holding hands is like the fourth grade equivalent of banging. Well in your case, twelfth grade. Self-five!'

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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 3

Robin: 'I can't believe my great grandparents still do that.'
Barney: 'And I never imagined a walker being used for anything other than walking.'

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Quote by James Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 3

Barney: 'You avoiding the family too?'
James: 'I'm gay, I'm black and I'm getting a divorce. Those walking skeletons are gonna have more questions for me than their pharmacists.'

Homosexuality
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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 2

Here's the thing, kids: When you believe in people, people come through.

Trust
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Quote by Marshall Eriksen from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 2

I'm from Minnesota, where there's plenty hot-dogs for everyone. Perhaps even too many...

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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 1

Barney: 'Our wedding is gonna be legendary.'
Robin: 'No wait for it?'
Barney: 'I've got you, I don't have to wait for it anymore.'

Love declerations
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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 21

Lily Aldrin: 'Guys, The Captain just made me a very interesting offer.'
Barney Stinson: 'Finally we get around to the real reason he hired you. Just promise you film it, and please use a tripod. There's nothing artistic about shaky-cam, it just looks sloppy.'

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Quote by Marshall Eriksen from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 23

Lily: 'Okay, stop! Every time he lands, that chair farts out ten-year-old Dorito dust.'
Marshall: 'Yeah, it's the chair...'

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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 23

Look, if Michael Jordan's healthy, you don't let Scottie Pippen run the offense. Oh, you're from Canada, right. If Wayne Gretzky's healthy, you don't let Fran├žois... what I'm saying is: hockey is stupid and I'm point guy!

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Quote by Marshall Eriksen from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 23

Italy doesn't need something that is wrinkled, red and leaky, and smells like booze and narcotics. They've already got former Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi.

Italy
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Quote by Lily Aldrin from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 24

So, what do you want to do tonight? Drink ourselves blind, set a car on fire? Oh, watch a movie that doesn't start with a desk lamp jumping on top of a capital 'I'?

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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 21

You know how sometimes you'll meet a girl and there'll be that one bewitching little detail that'll make you fall in love with her instantly? You know, a little freckle on the nose, the lilt of her laugh, the way she pronounces a certain word or phrase...

Falling in love
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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 18

Underneath all of those lies is one true thing. One true thing that can support the weight of all the lies in the world, and that's the fact that I love you.

Love declerations
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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 18

Barney: 'Ted what is my one rule?'
Ted: 'You can tell how old a girl is by her elbows?'
Barney: 'My other one rule.'
Ted: 'Flax seed relieves upset stomach?'
Barney: 'My other one rule.'
Ted: 'Always have a fake pair of concert tickets in your pocket in case Lily invites you to something stupid?'
Barney: 'My other one rule.'
Ted: 'Labanese girls sprint to third base and then stay there.'
Barney: 'My other one rule.'
Ted: 'New is always better?'
Barney: 'New is always better!'

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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 6

Every time I go after a busty dullard who can't tell time or thinks I'm the ghost of Leonardo DiCaprio, I'm shallow. But somehow it's okay for Robin to date a guy who can't be trusted around outlets.

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Quote by Robin Scherbatsky from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 24

Robin: 'This locket was my grandma's, she kept it hidden in her butt all through world war II.'
Lily: 'What? Where was she?'
Robin: 'Winnipeg. Come on, Lily, that is a joke.'

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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 24

Lily: 'Ted, you did this all yourself?'
Ted: 'Just like Ryan Gosling in 'The Notebook'. It was pretty manly 'til I mentioned Ryan Gosling in 'The Notebook', huh?'

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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 23

I only have one rule. For every three 10's you bang, throw a bone to a 5. They're grateful and hard working and let's face it, sometimes you just want to lay there.

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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 23

Kids, you can't cling to the past. Because no matter how tight you hold on... it's already gone.

Memory, Past
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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 14

Ted: 'My mother is not one-night-stand material!'
Barney: 'Yeah, you're right. It wasn't night and we weren't standing.'

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Quote by Robin Scherbatsky from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 14

Marshall: 'When a woman puts on an engagement ring, it's like when Bilbo Baggins wears the One Ring in The Hobbit.'
Robin: 'Okay, can you say that again, but not in nerd?'
Marshall: 'Sure. Uh, the ring is like the cloak that Harry Potter wears to sneak around Hogwarts.'
Robin: 'Yeah, I don't speak virgin either.'

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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 14

Turns out, when you projectile vomit on skates, you roll right into the spray.

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Quote by Marshall Eriksen from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 13

You're gonna get endless requests to play some game, that has something to do with gangsters and farming!

Facebook
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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 11

The last play you'll ever run.

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Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 11

Eight years ago I made an ass of myself chasing after you and I made an ass of myself chasing after you a bunch of times since then. And I have no regrets because it led me to something I wouldn't trade for the world, it led to you being my friend. So as your friend and a leading expert in the field of making an ass of yourself. I say to you, from the heart, get the hell out of this car!

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Characters from How I Met Your Mother