The best Quotes by Tina Fey

The best Quotes by Tina Fey

Elizabeth Stamatina "Tina" Fey (born May 18, 1970) is an American actress, comedian, writer, and producer. Fey was a cast member and head writer for the NBC sketch comedy series Saturday Night Live from 1997 to 2006. After her departure from SNL, she created the NBC sitcom 30 Rock (2006–2013, 2020) and the Netflix sitcom Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (2015–2020), the former of which she also starred in. Fey is also known for her work in film, including Mean Girls (2004), Baby Mama (2008), Date Night (2010), Megamind (2010), Muppets Most Wanted (2014), Sisters (2015), Whiskey Tango Foxtrot (2016), Wine Country (2019), and Soul (2020).

You can tell how smart people are by what they laugh at.
When choosing sexual partners, remember: talent is not sexually transmittable.
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You can't be that kid standing at the top of the water slide, overthinking it. You have to go down the chute.
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There's a benefit about losing: you get to learn from your mistakes.
6
I guess destiny is not the path given to us, but the path we choose for ourselves.
6
"Dawn Schweitzer is a fat virgin."
"Still half true."
1
Student: "Nice wig, Janis. What's it made of?"
Janis: "Your mom's chest hair!"
Gretchen, I'm sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea at Barnes & Nobles. And I'm sorry for telling everyone about it. And I'm sorry for repeating it now.
Karen Smith in Mean Girls
At your age, you're going to have a lot of urges. You're going to want to take off your clothes, and touch each other. But if you do touch each other, you will get chlamydia... and die.
Coach Carr in Mean Girls
Calling somebody else fat won't make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn't make you any smarter. And ruining Regina George's life definitely didn't make me any happier. All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you.
Cady Heron in Mean Girls
I have a nephew named Anfernee, and I know how mad he gets when I call him Anthony. Almost as mad as I get when I think about the fact that my sister named him Anfernee.
Mr. Duvall in Mean Girls
Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total sl*t and no other girls can say anything about it.
Cady Heron in Mean Girls
I love her. She's like a Martian!
Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die! Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, okay, promise? Okay... now everybody take some rubbers.
Coach Carr in Mean Girls
Get in loser, we're going shopping.
Regina George in Mean Girls
And on the third day, God created the Remington bolt-action rifle, so that Man could fight the dinosaurs. And the homosexuals.
Cady: "Yeah, I like math."
Damian: "Eww. Why?"
Cady: "Because it's the same in every country."
Cady Heron in Mean Girls
Gretchen: "That is so fetch!"
Regina: "Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen! It's not going to happen!"
Regina George in Mean Girls
Karen: "If you're from Africa, why are you white?"
Gretchen: "Oh my God, Karen, you can't just ask people why they're white."
In England, they drive on the left side of the road.
In Pennsylvania we drive on what's left of the road.
They say money can't buy happiness, but it can buy a flight to Pennsylvania - and that's pretty much the same thing.
My son Jack once said to me, "Dad, do you think people are laughing with you or at you?"
I said, "I don't care as long as they're laughing."
For the soul, laughing is what oxygen is for the lungs.
2
A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone.
Tyrion Lannister in Game of Thrones - Season 1 Episode 2
22
Smart women love smart men more than smart men love smart women.
2
If you want more sex, just ask for it.
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Sheldon: "You do understand that our efforts here will in no way increase the odds of having sexual congress with this woman?"
Leonard: "Men do things for women without expecting sex."
Sheldon: "Those would be men who just had sex."
Sheldon Cooper in The Big Bang Theory - Season 1 Episode 2
9
There's a lot of money to be made in scaring people.
Admitting your fears is the first and most difficult step in overcoming them.

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